1616 replies to this topic

[Vazor]

Granted, but she's Rosie O'Donnell. Which is wrong on several levels.

I wish Keith Moon and John Entwistle were still alive.

[Wolf O'Donnell]

Granted, they were still alive when they were alive. However, now they are alive now that they're dead, which means they are zombies or would do, if they hadn't been cremated by angry zombiephobes. The plus side? They have now become the world's first case of sentient ash.

I wish that Ash Ketchum wasn't such an annoying little [CENSORED].

[Gabe Puratekuta]

Granted, but then he becomes an annoying BIG [CENSORED]


I wish for a plasma rifle so I can hunt down the Trix rabbit

[Vazor]

No, because I played the Trix Rabbit in a skit I wrote for my Comedy Troupe's show, spoofing cereal mascots.

I wish that platypuses (platypi?) didn't lay eggs and reproduced like normal mammals!

[Gabe Puratekuta]

Granted!!!


What is love?

[Ace]

I wish Link X had posted correctly...

[Wolf O'Donnell]

Granted, but this makes your post incorrect. It also makes you look like a silly little clown.

I wish that all wishes were alright.

[Gabe Puratekuta]

Granted, but some people didn't want the wishes to be in the first place anc complain to you about it. Forever.


I wish to learn Ninjitsu

[Vazor]

Granted, but you fall down a flight of stairs in a completely unrelated accident, killing you.

I wish I didn't get hit by a runaway golf ball yesterday.

[Gabe Puratekuta]

Granted. It was a charter bus.


I wish I wasn't such an insomniac

[Vazor]

Granted, but you sleep so long that you eventually become part of the bed, until you are no longer distinguishable from the mattress. When you wake up, you discover that you have been sold to a motel, and that you are unable to detatch yourself from the mattress or move, and you live out the rest of your days disturbed by the rampant unprotected love-making that happens on you so frequently.

I wish I had a new hilighter. (...what?)

[Stalfos]

granted, but it lights on fire on top of a building!

i wish for peking duck!

[Gabe Puratekuta]

Granted, but then it comes back to life just as you start eating and it starts 'peking' your eyes out with a spork.


I wish I could get better ideas

[Stalfos]

granted, but they all involve hugging the teletubbies.

i wish vazor was a waffle.

[31-Year-Old-From-Georgia]

Granted.

I wish I could see the dorm banners...

[Stalfos]

granted. for 1 second. then you can't see them again.

i wish teeny would post as much in the games as link x, vazor, and i.

[Vazor]

Granted, but he makes the two of you look like dorks, while enhancing my already awesome image.

I wish I had the new Rolling Stones album.

[Gabe Puratekuta]

Granted. You think it's total crap and kill yourself


I wish for pie

[Isis]

Granted: But the pie had four and twenty alive blackbirds in it which pecked of your nose

I wish I could go to Egypt

[Wolf O'Donnell]

Granted, but when you do, the Sphinx comes alive and asks you that famous riddle, "What walks on four legs in the morning, two legs in the afternoon and three legs in the evening?" It unfortunately turns out that Man isn't the correct answer, because the Sphinx wasn't taking poetic licence and was being very literal. The correct answer is Nothing, but by the time you realise this it is too late and you have already been digested.

(Seriously, You really shouldn't, what with the terrorists and everything).

I wish that flowers would instantaneously bloom on top of George W Bush's head.

[Gabe Puratekuta]

Granted, but the spew the same crap that he spews out of his mouth


I wish I knew what I was doing

[Stalfos]

granted, but it's walking into a brick wall. and you can't stop.

i wish for teletubbies to be extinct.

[Wolf O'Donnell]

Granted, but something far more evil arises to take its place... the Evil, Maniacal Bananas in Pyjamas.

I wish that I knew why peach = spork

[Stalfos]

granted, but it's because she's not very smart. nor are you. j/k

i wish i was invincible.

[Vazor]

Granted, but you drown, and the lack of air kills you, your impenetrable body offering no solace.

I wish it were Christmas!

[Wolf O'Donnell]

Granted, but unfortunately you are paid a visit by an Angel that tells you that not only is Christmas a sham, but also the existence of Santa Claus.

I wish I knew how purple-leaved trees photosynthesise.

[Gabe Puratekuta]

Granted, but that knowledge causes severe hemorhaging in you brain and kills you.


I wish these speakers worked right now

[Vazor]

Granted, but they give you herpes. (Man, I haven't used that one in ages. Heh.)

I wish Jimmy Page could play the guitar well again.

[Gabe Puratekuta]

Granted, but then he makes another album with Sean 'Puffy' Combs and it sucks ass.


I wisk I had better spriting skills

[Wolf O'Donnell]

You wisk something? Granted, but the sprites are so realistic, they come to life and do unmentionable things to your computer.

I wish that nobody would use the "but they give you herpes" phrase in this game for the next month.