132 replies to this topic

[Nevermind]

Okay, I have to agree that there are [img]http://forums.legendsalliance.com/public/ALOT.png[/img] of people who do that, especially guys. But the majority tend not to.

[Fizzbit]

Run around telling your fetishes. Alright, you'll get just about as many strange looks as a gay person who's really open about it.

I put my openness in my signature because it's who I am, and I'm proud of it. Since I'm also a moderator of the life forum here, I put the fact that I am a bisexual in my signature so I don't have to repeat my entire schpiel to people.

I'm not extremely open. I'm open, but not to the point of flambuoyancy. I'm not asking people to pay attention to me, give me money, give me sympathy, or anything else. I just want them to have the knowledge. I don't use my sexuality as a lifeline in tough situations, unlike some homosexuals/bisexuals you may have encountered in the past.

If you have a problem with people and their openness about homosexuality, heterosexuality, or otherwise, please send a Private Message to any of our message board's administrators asking them to consider telling people to keep it in the closet. All I can tell you is that I am not breaking any rules by announcing my personality in my signature, and I am within the signature size limit. You may find my choice to announce my lifestyle annoying, but unless it is blatantly, flat-out insulting you and possibly causing you physical pain, no changes will be made.

Just to let you know, I have had this exact signature for several months now. The original signature included a picture defending Pro-Choice for abortion along with my bisexuality icon. Khuffie asked me to remove the Pro-Choice, since that is a very controversial thing that would actually cause me grief, and eventually the forum, but he allowed me to keep the bisexuality icon, and I have had it, with the rainbows, in my signature ever since.

[SOAP]

That is a very stupid generalization. Most gays don't even do that and only one person is that open about that stuff here and she's a girl. Still think Fizz is rubbing it in your face?

[Oberon Storm]

If it is in their signature what does it matter? It's their signature. You can choose to eithe rnot look at signatures or turn them off. Just like in public. You can either choose to pay attention and let yourself be offended to the one flaunting their homosexuality or you can ignore it.

[SOAP]

You wanna know what I think. I think you just don't like gays because they're not in your control. After all, they have fun doing something that you don't approve of and nothing you say can stop them from continuing to do so. So you make up stupid generalizations and false justifications... because it gives you some sense of power. But what you do have power over is how you react to gays. Getty all pissy-pants over a silly sig shows you can't even control yourself. How sad.

[Zythe]

Don't like Fizz's sig? Do like Tekky and disable them.

[SOAP]

Sigs are useless anyways. They're basically spam and timeline thoeories mostly.

[Zythe]

Sigs aren't spam. Explain that to me, because I've never known a sig to post without its member knowing.

They're just what we use to express opinions and ourselves quickly without the formality of explaining it constantly. (Like, Fizz is gay. Check. MJ is a single timeliner. Check. Vazor is crazy. Check. Husky loves wolves etc. etc.)

[Joeb Wan Kenobi]

The strange thing about all of this is that its fine to be proud of being gay or black or asian or whatever but if you're proud of being straight or white you get called a homophobe or a racist. I for one am sick of gay people going round saying Im gay look at me, Im so great, do you have a problem that? Its like they want people to dislike them. The gay people who get the most respect are those who dont make a song and dance about it.

[SOAP]

You obviously weren't attention. No one said anything about his sig. Just his generalizations.

[Oberon Storm]

This could quickly turn into something belonging in Contro.

The strange thing about all of this is that its fine to be proud of being gay or black or asian or whatever but if you're proud of being straight or white you get called a homophobe or a racist.

Lets be fair now. The only white pride gatherings I have ever seen involved toothless rednecks sporting white hoods and swastikas. They commonly burn crosses.

[Jaina]

yeah be careful or I will have to move this to contro I think a lot of us are friends with people who are bi or homosexual/lesbian and to and extent some do..and dont know it. When I was in High School I had probably about..4-5 guys in my little 'clique' and by the end of High School I found out that ever single of one of them was either bi or gay! And I am NOT kidding. I guess that would explain why a lot of them never went out of their way to date us XD Being gay is just a part of our lifestyle is America now and always has..so it isnt something you can just wish away. I would suggest just getting used to it..since I dont know of any other way to really help you. Since closing your eyes and saying you want them to go away isnt going to do a thing

[Nevermind]

You wanna know what I think. I think you just don't like gays because they're not in your control. After all, they have fun doing something that you don't approve of and nothing you say can stop them from continuing to do so. So you make up stupid generalizations and false justifications... because it gives you some sense of power. But what you do have power over is how you react to gays. Getty all pissy-pants over a silly sig shows you can't even control yourself. How sad.

As oppose to maybe he doesn't like the whole idea of homosexuality itself?

[SOAP]

Well think of it from a gay's prospective. They have to deal with straight guys talk contstantly about girl's body parts in the most vulgar ways. It's in daily conversation, on TV, and in the songs they hear. But then a straight person gets their panties in a twist just because one of them decides to rock the rainbow. Wanna know what I'm sick of? Sexual advertisement in general. Period. that goes for gays and straights BOTH!

You think we're the ones who strive for controversy? That we're hungry for tearing down potential homophobes? That we're making a big deal about it? You're the one who decided to start this thread hitting on the subject in the first place. You directly made a comment against a member's sig, saying that kind of information is better kept to herself. not only that but something that is part of who she is. Thus you made a stand. Against her sig. Against her. Against others like her. In response, we made ours. If you didn't like how we responded then don't try to start anything to begin with.

Edit: Out of all fairness. My previous post did go too far. But still! There are [img]http://forums.legendsalliance.com/public/ALOT.png[/img] gays here at LA ([img]http://forums.legendsalliance.com/public/ALOT.png[/img] more than I had imagined) and I'm very protective of everyone of them. It's paternal instinct I guess.

[Masamune]

Actually History, as said, just said it reminded him. And it is true to extent, but no just with the homosexual community, but with a lot of minority groups. It's not the WHOLE group doing it, but some person drawing attention to theirself and what they claim to represent. Frankly it's nothing but annoying.

Granted, I don't see much point mentioning your sexuality, religion, political affiliation, or what have you in your sig. And yes Zythe, sigs are like spam. They are pointless messages that suck bandwidth. It's like having commercials in between posts. I don't mind them that much, but some of the longer ones are annoying.

[SOAP]

I hate it when you make sense Masa.

I just get pissed off when people find problems with gays drawing attention to themselves when straight guys (and some women) do way worse on a more frequent basis yet what the latter group does is percieved as normal and is tolerated while with the former it still isn't. Like I said, I'm sick with sexual advertisement of any sort.

[joeymartin64]

Y'know what I find kinda funny about the gay/bi issue, about teens specifically? That some who think they are aren't. Seriously. They find out that their body enjoys... contact... and doesn't care what gender it's coming from, and they suddenly decide that they're homosexual/bisexual. I'm not saying that this IS the case with anyone directly referenced here, I'm just saying it happens. Specifically, though... Jaina, some of those guys probably weren't really gay/bi. They just thought they were. Like I said, it happens.

I'll probably address the issue more in-depth later.

[Nevermind]

I like hugs from guys, I'll admit that, but only from probably about 4 or 5 specific guys. And those are guys I've grown up with. They're my best friends, and I'd do anything for them. I enjoy giving them a hug because on the times that we do, it's because one or the other just needs it from someone who cares. Like JM64 was implying, just because I enjoy that physical contact doesn't mean I'm in any way gay, but [img]http://forums.legendsalliance.com/public/ALOT.png[/img] of young teenagers do actually think "oh shit, I like it, am I gay? I must be gay".

[Jaina]

Well JM you are right to an extent, one of them was Bi..and messed around with another guy..but now he is pretty much engaged to a girl. I am pretty sure he is like 75% straight now. I dunno..most of these people dont make a point to talk to me now It is like now that we are out of High School we live seperate lives. And yeah..some of the guys are now totally 100% gay or just came out of the closet this year.

[SOAP]

Y'know what I find kinda funny about the gay/bi issue, about teens specifically? That some who think they are aren't. Seriously. They find out that their body enjoys... contact... and doesn't care what gender it's coming from, and they suddenly decide that they're homosexual/bisexual. I'm not saying that this IS the case with anyone directly referenced here, I'm just saying it happens. Specifically, though... Jaina, some of those guys probably weren't really gay/bi. They just thought they were. Like I said, it happens.

I'll probably address the issue more in-depth later.

Yes. That happens and it's unfortunate that some people get stuck in a lifestyle that is targeted by much animosity just because they think the don't have any choice when in fact there is. And then there are people who are just curious. And some people flip-flop around because they just don't know what they want. And then there's guys who'd boink anything with a hole in it. But that's not the point. If you have sex with a member of your own sex and you like it you are gay by the strictest sense of the word. Whether you do it for meaningful relationships or not or if you decide later on that it's not your thing after all is totally irrellevant. And no, getting enjoyment from man-hugs doesn't make you gay. That's just stupid. Anyone who seriously thinks that should be shot.

Anyways. I know what I am. And more importantly, I know what I'm not. I don't have to fitt any stupid stereotypes just to justify what I am. Er... y'all can interpret that anyway you like.

[Fizzbit]

OK, since we obviously have a homophobe amongst us... allow me to ask everyone in the forum that is reading this a question:

How many times have any of our homo/bisexual members (myself or otherwise) have used our sexuality to get attention outside of threads that specifically talk about sexuality?

Twinrova (lesbian member here that recently left) was the only other member aside from myself that let people know who she was via signature icons/images.

Sometimes homosexuals and bisexuals let people know who they are because the norm simply is to be straight. If we didn't let people know, we'd just be mistaken for another straight person, which is complete bullshit. We'd rather let people know and take the beef from it than have to correct people every time when they ask if we have a life partner of the opposite gender.

I'm bisexual. Half-straight, half-gay. Yes, I have a boyfriend currently, and he knows I'm comfortably open. I don't advertise it in the way I dress or act, but if people ask, I let them know. And in this forum, it's my choice to let people know before they ask.

History, if you really have such a hard time dealing with the fact that I'm open about my sexuality, please either talk to an administrator, or go into your user control panel, and disable signatures. That way you can browse threads easier knowing that you won't have to see rainbows in anyone's signature. But regardless of how much you complain about how it makes you feel uncomfortable, I'm not going to bend to anyone's will unless I am talked to by an administrator. As I have said before, the rainbows and icon have been in my signature for many months. Good luck getting anything done.

[Nevermind]

Wait, he speaks up about something and he's a homophobe?

I don't dislike gay people, I dislike homosexuality. It doesn't appeal to me. At all.

Am I a homophobe?

[Archaic Sage]

Wait, he speaks up about something and he's a homophobe?

I don't dislike gay people, I dislike homosexuality. It doesn't appeal to me. At all.

Am I a homophobe?

Clearly. Hating the Sin but not the Sinner doesn't work. It's a contradiction in terms. A phobia is an irrational fear of something, although one can argue all fears are rational, as they are learnt through classical conditioning it's still has an irrational beginning. You may or may not be religious, but the reference to sin is something that describes what you stated rather well, at least I believe.

Following is to everyone:

I'm straight, probably not 100%, but no one is a hundred percent straight or gay. I am open about my sexuality, if someone asks, I say. Why shouldn't a homosexual person do that, or a bisexual for that matter.

Yes, those who run around in pink spandex and scream that they are gay, they can be annoying. But it's no more annoying than the latest rapper's video with half naked women waving their businesses around for those who are gay. Intolerance works both ways. In the western world we are lucky to have freedom of speech, to a degree, why not tell people who you are or what your opinions are. I don't like it when I see someone saying: "Go Fox Hunting!", as hunting is barbaric, but have I posted a topic saying how people like that are annoying and should be silenced? Nope. Because you've got to give and take a bit. What you see as normal may not be for someone else.

[Nevermind]

So basically, you're saying it's impossible for me to like a person if a don't like their sexual preference?
For one, I have to strongly disagree with that. I know a few gay guys. They're cool guys, but what they do with other guys is something I don't want to hear about, because I just find the whole idea of man to man wrong. Yet I am still able to get along with these guys without a problem. Hating the sin, but not the sinner DOES work, because liking someone for them themselves, i.e. personality, attitude, sense of humour, has nothing to do with who they get intimate with.

And for two, I'm not afraid of homosexuality. I know I'm not gay, I know others are gay. It doesn't scare me at all, I just find it unappealing.

And finally, on your terms, if a gay person dislikes heterosexuality, do you ever hear "heterophobe" thrown around? No. They're just really, really gay. Well, why can't we just be really, really straight?

My definition for a homophobe would be someone who doesn't like a person simply because they are gay. There is a difference between unappealing and offensive.


And one more thing. Rappers flaunting all their women is different from pink spandexters. They do that to go "look at me, I'm so hot and cool and can get whatever I want" rather than "look at me, I like women. I'm straight and super proud of it".

And to top off, no one said anything about them not being able to be open about it. The whole point was about those who unnecessarily flaunt it in the face of others.

[Archaic Sage]

So basically, you're saying it's impossible for me to like a person if a don't like their sexual preference?
For one, I have to strongly disagree with that. I know a few gay guys. They're cool guys, but what they do with other guys is something I don't want to hear about, because I just find the whole idea of man to man wrong. Yet I am still able to get along with these guys without a problem. Hating the sin, but not the sinner DOES work, because liking someone for them themselves, i.e. personality, attitude, sense of humour, has nothing to do with who they get intimate with.

And for two, I'm not afraid of homosexuality. I know I'm not gay, I know others are gay. It doesn't scare me at all, I just find it unappealing.

http://www.cogsci.pr....1?s=homophobia

One definition of homophobia, you do the math.

And finally, on your terms, if a gay person dislikes heterosexuality, do you ever hear "heterophobe" thrown around? No. They're just really, really gay. Well, why can't we just be really, really straight?

Actually, I know two hetrophobes. Two lesbians who hate straight people. Don't ask me why they hate me, you, and all straight people, but they do. It's just who they are. They can hate me for me being straight if they want. No skin off my nose.

My definition for a homophobe would be someone who doesn't like a person simply because they are gay. There is a difference between unappealing and offensive.

Well, that depends. Often something unappealing usually turns to offensive. Like I find rappers unappealing, and more often than not, they are offensive to me.

And one more thing. Rappers flaunting all their women is different from pink spandexters. They do that to go "look at me, I'm so hot and cool and can get whatever I want" rather than "look at me, I like women. I'm straight and super proud of it".

I find that the two definitions you have used there are one and the same. If I can get women to flaunt their bodies all over me, then that makes me super straight and proud. No different from gay people in their spandex showing how gay they are.

And to top off, no one said anything about them not being able to be open about it. The whole point was about those who unnecessarily flaunt it in the face of others.

And that was the whole point of my post. What you see as flaunting homosexuality can be seen in the eyes of a gay as no different than rappers/hip hop and the rest of the crap flaunting their sexuality, in videos, and getting paid.

[Nevermind]

Well the problems there tend to be the fact that I am different to every other person, like every other person is to each other. So regarding that definition, I'd have to say it's a simple load of bullshit, because I myself contradict it by my own attitude towards the situation. I am certainly not offended by homosexuality. You may be offended by rappers, but I am not offended by gayness, I just do not want any part in it.

And I still stand by my rapper situations. They are not the same. Ego and sexuality are not the same thing. They're flaunting the fact that they can get all these women, not the fact that they are getting women rather than men. They're not trying to prove to people that they are straight, they are simply talking themselves up and basically being arrogant and egotistical. The equivalent to that would be a gay person being arrogant because they are hot and can get as many guys/girls as they want, because of that fact, nothing to do with the fact that they are gay.

Hmmm...

[Masamune]

You can hate the sin but not the sinner? Wow. So basically, what you're saying is that either I have to love liars or hate them. They may've lied once, but I'll be damned if I'm gonna not hate the sinner. Great logic there.

It's not practical to go around hating people for every sin they commit because, after all, we're all a bunch of no-good sinning bastards anyways. And it's not practical to fall into the politically correct 'accept people no matter what' hole. It's not my place to condemn a person for what they do, but I do reserve the right to dislike what it is they do. And no, I'm not going to change my mind because of some stupid dictionary definition that didn't exist a decade or so ago.

[Archaic Sage]

Well the problems there tend to be the fact that I am different to every other person, like every other person is to each other. So regarding that definition, I'd have to say it's a simple load of bullshit, because I myself contradict it by my own attitude towards the situation. I am certainly not offended by homosexuality. You may be offended by rappers, but I am not offended by gayness, I just do not want any part in it.

So, you don't want to be gay, so you don't like homosexuality, but you like or don't mind homosexuals? This is something that I have trouble understanding. How can you hate something but love it too?

And I still stand by my rapper situations. They are not the same. Ego and sexuality are not the same thing. They're flaunting the fact that they can get all these women, not the fact that they are getting women rather than men. They're not trying to prove to people that they are straight, they are simply talking themselves up and basically being arrogant and egotistical. The equivalent to that would be a gay person being arrogant because they are hot and can get as many guys/girls as they want, because of that fact, nothing to do with the fact that they are gay.

Again, I still stand by my original comment. It's clear that if you've got a load of half naked women around you, dancing, and you're smiling, that you're straight. Just like in Elton John's video for I'm still Standing. Men = half naked == Elton John happy.

Hmmm...

And chav wasn't in the dictionary until recently. It is now. Just like muggle.

You've got to remember that saying straights can hate gays, but gays can't hate straights is like saying that only white people can be racist. Wrong.