Uh oh.
In the interest of fairness, I understand your viewpoint. There are eleventy-billion labels for gender and sexual identity out there -- and it can be incredibly confusing and overwhelming and frustrating even for the people who would use said labels. Some people find power and safety in labels. I know that I've always hated them. I don't even call myself a lesbian unless labeling myself in some way is unavoidable. And when someone describes themselves using a whole chain of labels, it's easy to have a "...really? :| " moment.
(It's not necessarily like that with everyone, though. Modern Native American LGBT folk use the term "two-spirit" as something of an umbrella term for everyone who isn't strictly heterosexual and/or a conventional gender -- which is an approach I've always liked better, because it doesn't box people in and creates a greater sense of community.)
That said.
Gender identity has never been a simple thing, even throughout history. "Third gender" identities have existed in many cultures. Some still do, though extensive missionary work greatly reduced how common this was. Each culture had their own terms for the third gender -- sometimes one umbrella term, sometimes several more specific terms. They had their own roles in society, distinct from male and female gender roles. Often served as mediators and spiritual leaders. Some didn't "assign" kids a gender at birth, and the kid later picked their own gender expression. And would from that point on be referred to as a man or woman or "other" as they wished.
But that's ancient history, and I doubt many people care much about that because we're not living in ancient history anymore. We're living now.
And now, yes, there's a confusing cluster of labels. Maybe because all those old traditions were lost and people are just kind of going every which way in a blind-but-well-meaning attempt to reclaim the old third gender roles.
There are many reasons why someone chooses an alternate gender label. Because, again, gender has never been binary or simplistic once you peel back the layers. Sometimes it's because they physically feel more in tune with one gender. Sometimes it's because of personality or character reasons -- and they feel like they need to appeal to society's strictly binary view on gender ("Well, I've always acted more like a man and people say I'm such a 'bad' woman, so...."). Or sometimes they just don't like to be boxed in, because they themselves are kind of all over the place. Whatever the reason, sometimes they just feel like they "belong" with a gender other than the one they were born into.
There are a lot of reasons.
Of course, a lot of people don't like it. A lot of people think that it's weird. Or unnecessary. Or pointless. Because the conventional way is so simple and easy, and this is the way it's always been since any of us can remember, so why go changing everything to accommodate this small fraction of the population?
This is a natural, uncomfortable response to not having full control of a thing anymore. If you are a white male Christian, you've gone unchallenged for the last several hundred years in American and European society. Smaller groups were more or less nuisances that could be ignored. You've had it your way, 100% of the time, until just very recently. And losing that, even a bit, makes the traditional holders of power feel challenged -- and that's "uncomfortable." Because now there has to be compromise.
It is seen anywhere. Women of all creeds have traditionally been lashed out at for taking more domineering roles in society -- even today. More so if they were a woman of color. Assertive women are called bitches. Sluts. People tell us we have no place in certain professions that we are more than qualified for. Championing for more rights is seen as women being "nuisances." Or we're told to just "get over it already" when we complain about a thing that affects us. Like wanting equal pay.
It's seen whenever a Mexican-American flies the Mexican flag on their own property. Not because they place their native culture above their current nationality. Because it's always been acceptable for people like me to fly Swedish flags on our property. For me, proudly displaying my Swedish heritage can be a source of pleasant conversation and friend-making, because some Norwegian will come along and try to playfully tease me, and we'll have a back and forth. But because the ethnic makeup of America is rapidly shifting from white to Latino, the latter are seen as threats, and people treat them with suspicion because they are "challenging the traditional majority."
It's seen when people suggest changing the name of the Redskins -- giving rise to similar "get over it" responses. The term's racist, the Natives don't like it and never have, but because they're just a slim chunk of the population, petitioning for a name change is seen as a small group of people "needlessly bothering" the majority, who don't see or understand the implications of the term because it's not about them.
And it's seen with the trans(+) population, because they are challenging conventional gender norms. The majority would be required to find ways to accommodate them, and that's a burden for the majority. Even if it's purely a burden of mentality. It means they have to retool their thinking. Make some room for a population they once ignored because it was infinitely smaller than the majority.
The relative "invisibility" and "dismissal" of the trans population is also the leading reason for why they are the most abused members of the greater queer spectrum. They are more likely to be beaten. They are more likely to face discrimination. They are more likely to be the victims of a hate crime than the otherwise "conventional-gendered" gay or lesbian. And since we get enough flack as it is, that's saying quite a bit. People fear the unknown, and they hurt what they're afraid of.
Generally speaking, a trans (or whatever) individual will keep their complicated labels to themselves. Unless you ask them to describe the inner workings of their identity.
Otherwise, at the end of the day, the only thing they'll really ask of you is to use the pronoun they wish to be identified with. Which is not that great of a burden. But a lot of people act like it is.
