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Why?! Why is my house infested with bugs?


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#1 BurgundyTears

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Posted 05 August 2011 - 12:52 AM

So.

Eastern Iowa has been especially hot compared to normal this year, with no random cold snaps.

My house is about 50 years old.

Do the math.

This entire summer has seen a parade of both the usual insect invaders and new and exciting ones that are terrorizing the shit out of me. Lots of house centipedes for the cats to eat all the legs off before murdering them (seriously, one of my cats loves to do that). Little spiders all the time. There was a random wave of strange worm-like things that seems to have gone away now. Gigantic pill bugs in strange parts of the house. I think we have a carpet bug infestation too. Or at least, there's some kind of strange little bug somewhere between a tick and a beetle that isn't a bedbug showing up all over the house.

And tonight.

Tonight there was a fucking huge spider in my purse.

To give you some perspective, by purse I mean an actual police swat bag complete with ammo pouches that I use to carry things like my wallet, DS, novels... sometimes rug yarn for making hooked rugs. It's big and black and made of kevlar.

By huge fucking spider, I mean a spider of unknown species, but the kind with longer front legs, that is about the size of a silver fucking dollar. Yeah, you know, the coins with Kennedy on them that you think "why would they ever make such a big impractical coin for general circulation?".

And my husband is sleeping like the dead because he's got a bit of a cold and when I reached in my bag for one of my DS game cases, it crawled on my fucking hand and settled on something brightly colored so I could see it quite well enough. So of course I haven't got my games, and I can't wake my husband to deal with the giant motherfucking mutant spider, and I can't deal with it because I'm a total pansy when it comes to bugs.

And now I won't be able to sleep because it is lurking in my bag and I won't see when it leaves the bag and then it will crawl on my face when I'm sleeping.

AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

Transcription of the profanity I pronounced upon discovery:
Spoiler


#2 SnowsilverKat

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Posted 05 August 2011 - 01:19 AM

I feel as an entomologist I should chime in:

...I too would unleash a string of most creative profanity if a spider surprised me out of my bag. Oddly enough considering my profession I am quite the arachnophobe. I don't like touching spiders, at all. The good news is spiders tend not to bite unless they're panicking and feel trapped. At the same time, I'm not thinking such logical things when I have a spider on me, it's more along the lines of 'GAWRAWGEGH SPIDER ON ME ARGLSGHGLHGL"

#3 Egann

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Posted 05 August 2011 - 09:07 AM

Yeah. Big Fucking Bugs are nothing new to me; I used to live in a home in the country (surrounded on three sides with cow pastures and chicken houses.) Between May and September the ladybugs would be so common there would be a LAYER of them across the floor, and vacuuming only seemed to buy a few days before they were all back. There would also be three or four wasp nests uncomfortably close to the doors....


In any case, bugs (especially large bugs) need a lot of water, so get yourself a dehumidifier or three (depending on how big your house is) and dry your house out. Also get your vacuum cleaner out because there will be quite a few corpses.

#4 BurgundyTears

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Posted 05 August 2011 - 10:39 AM

If I dehumidified the house enough to get rid of the bugs, my cats and I would probably shrivel up and die. Fighting summer humidity might be pretty expensive in the energy bill, too.

Big fucking bugs aren't new to me, but they don't belong in Iowa! I grew up in Florida, where they belong. You know, hot, humid, no winter. They thrive. I once saw a wolf spider the size of a tarantula. But Iowa, Iowa has winter. And is dry...during the winter (inconvenient, that. if it was dry in summer, there'd be less bugs).

So you know, we've always got house centipedes. I or the cats eliminate them. Sometimes a little spider, which I leave alone unless I think it's poisonous. But not giant spiders in my purse! That is right up there with snakes in your boots!

Incidentally, my husband did wake up, and we dumped the bag on the porch, and we decided the spider was probably an excessively large brown house spider, but I still checked my hand this morning to make sure I didn't get bitten because it was huge, so maybe it was a brown recluse and I don't want to have an undead hand.

Yknow snow, I like bugs in theory, but in practice I find them terribly upsetting. I suspect it's my overactive imagination.

#5 Sondilyn

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Posted 05 August 2011 - 11:09 AM

At least house centipedes eat silverfish and other creepy crawlies. And they tend to stay hidden until night time. We have a couple patroling our apartment. My ultimatum: If it comes near enough to me where I can hit it, it dies. It's stuck to that and won't come out or will only be out for a few minutes near the ceiling.

Spiders though... eech. I would have had the same reaction but no matter what was in the bag threw it against the floor multiple times and possibly stomped on it all while swearing.

#6 Elvenlord

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Posted 05 August 2011 - 11:33 AM

If you don't mind a bit of slightly dark humor:

Spoiler


#7 ~Celesta~

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Posted 05 August 2011 - 12:17 PM

oh god spiders! >.<
I knew I shouldn't have read this topic, I just knew a spider would be involved. Now I am going to be paranoid of the slightest itch I have, thinking its a huge ass spider or something.

I have a particularly annoying spider that I am pretty sure is tormenting me at this point. It's a jumping spider, so it's pretty small and really doesn't do much to me except cause a mild panic at the thought that its movement is something bigger. And since it is so small I try to swat it away, only to miss and have it come back later. But the part that gets me is WHERE it's hanging out to do this tormenting. My laptop, the top of it, so I will looking at the screen and then see strange movement, panic and then realize its a tiny spider. >.<

I would probably go crazy if I had to deal with what you are dealing with BurgundyTears. T.T

#8 Wolf O'Donnell

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Posted 05 August 2011 - 02:01 PM

On the plus side, if a money spider crawls on you, it means you're going to come into money soon.

Edited by Wolf O'Donnell, 05 August 2011 - 02:01 PM.


#9 Sir Deimos

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Posted 05 August 2011 - 02:36 PM

Note to self. Don't move to fucking Iowa.

#10 Dizzy

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Posted 05 August 2011 - 04:42 PM

I mean a spider of unknown species, but the kind with longer front legs, that is about the size of a silver fucking dollar.


Were the huge front legs darker than the rest of its legs?

What was the spider's overall color?

:3: Don't mind me... Just curious, is all.








We've had a really strange summer, so all sorts of bugs have been making their way into the house. It seems like every other day my sister pulls me away from what I'm doing to identify the bug/arachnid and "kill" it.

#11 BurgundyTears

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Posted 05 August 2011 - 05:50 PM

The front legs weren't huge, they just seemed longer than the other 6 legs. It's probably more the way it likes to arrange them than an actual difference. And it was grayish brown and had the violin deal on it, except the body shape was wrong for a recluse.

Since my hand shows no sign of injury or trying to strangle me of its own accord, I assume I didn't get bitten, regardless of whether it was actually venomous.

#12 Showsni

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Posted 05 August 2011 - 06:07 PM

Urgh, spiders. We seem to get quite a few... I'm pretty much a total wimp when it comes to spiders. I guess the best method is try to drop a large glass over them, then slide some paper/card underneath and carry them outside.

Do you get many venomous spiders in America? I mean, the UK doesn't actually have any dangerous spiders; the worst we get are escapees or exotic imports that came in with the bananas or what have you, and that's pretty rare.

I've never seen any centipedes or millipedes inside (that would be horrible). We get the odd woodlouse, silverfish or earwig, but they're not too bad. No, the worst thing that happens is when a wasp gets inside.


#13 BurgundyTears

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Posted 05 August 2011 - 10:17 PM

Well, N. and S. America are connected by a fairly large land bridge, so unlike an island nation, any place here without a serious winter is prone to dangerous insects. Some places are worse than others. Up in Canada, the most they have is Black Widows really.

Iowa only has two venomous spiders (Brown Recluse and Black Widows) and a handful of other dangerous insects, but it's got winter so that's about it. But places like Florida and say, Texas, get a wonderful variety in quantity. But there are bees and wasps absolutely everywhere until you get really far north. My brother has to employ 3-4 different methods of keeping them off my parents' property, depending on the type - mud wasps, ground wasps, yellow jackets, paper wasps....

#14 Elvenlord

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Posted 05 August 2011 - 10:41 PM

Texas gets so many bugs o_0

#15 Twinrova

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Posted 06 August 2011 - 01:27 AM

More bugs/spiders are the exact reason I will never, ever willingly move any further south than I am now. >_>

#16 ninja kitten

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Posted 08 August 2011 - 01:46 PM

Everyone should come to Idaho! The most common spider is the Daddy Long Leg, which spends most of its time outside. In the house I grew up in we had a small problem with Tunnel spiders in the basement and Wasps outside. In my current apartment my biggest problem is the aphid-infected philodendron my sister gave me as a house warming gift that I can't seem to cure. I only found two centipedes, but I'm pretty certain they came in on something from my hubby's storage.

ANYWAYS, long story short, Idaho is pretty much awesome for not having to deal with bugs... at least in houses (not including basements which are free game for all things creepy).

#17 Showsni

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Posted 09 August 2011 - 07:03 PM

Talking of which, there's a Daddy Long Legs in my house at the moment, in the next room to mine. It's really pathetic how I'm kind of scared of them... All they do is attempt to fly somewhat pathetically along, bouncing off the floor/walls and not really being a threat to anything. Yet I hate the idea of them touching me. They're so big and leggy! Look how big and leggy they are!

Posted Image


#18 ninja kitten

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Posted 10 August 2011 - 04:56 PM

Eww!! I honestly thought Daddy Long Legs couldn't get worse... and then they sprouted wings. >_<

#19 BurgundyTears

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Posted 10 August 2011 - 05:06 PM

So, in Japan, a "daddy long legs" is a mysterious benefactor, probably from the utterly obscure novel by Jean Webster.

And I'm not moving to Idaho. It may not have many bugs, but bugs are a small price to pay to not be in Idaho.

#20 Wolverine

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Posted 10 August 2011 - 05:08 PM

If you don't mind a bit of slightly dark humor:

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Wholeheartedly agree :D

#21 ninja kitten

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Posted 10 August 2011 - 10:44 PM

And I'm not moving to Idaho. It may not have many bugs, but bugs are a small price to pay to not be in Idaho.


And what's wrong with Idaho? Why you hatin'? Posted Image

#22 SnowsilverKat

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Posted 10 August 2011 - 10:51 PM

Talking of which, there's a Daddy Long Legs in my house at the moment, in the next room to mine. It's really pathetic how I'm kind of scared of them... All they do is attempt to fly somewhat pathetically along, bouncing off the floor/walls and not really being a threat to anything. Yet I hate the idea of them touching me. They're so big and leggy! Look how big and leggy they are!

*cute liddle crane fly*


Aww, cute liddle crane fly!

Seriously though, you don't get much more harmless then these...they just kind of gently bumble along without a care... ;d

See, for us a daddy longlegs is this guy:
Posted Image
Also harmless. Sorry, the entomologist in me kind of geeks out about this stuff. Ask Sond about it, she's got stories.

#23 ninja kitten

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Posted 10 August 2011 - 11:31 PM

The ones around my house are a little more grey... I think. I try to not look too close. Daddy Long Legs tend to survive my shoe only because they are harmless and eat lots of annoying little bugs.

#24 Guest_bulleto_*

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Posted 11 August 2011 - 12:31 AM

i sometimes have a lizard in my room !!! and wherever it is in the house, "I" have to kill it! Everyone has to call me to kill it. But i'm not in the mood all the time to just easily go for its hunt. It scares me at times, but when i'm pissed at something its really really easy to hunt it down. But they r really yucky to look at :( ... i almost want to throw up usually, i hate them in my room i just hate them. But spiders have never been a problem, the ones you guys are talking about, i have never even heard of so many different kinds/names (i mean i know they have many kinds but). sigh ...
and the big lizards they move too fast >: ... but the thing is they dont come for you :o .. I thank God for that, they r usually hunting around for bugs and stay away from me.

In the summer though, the big problem used to be mosquitoes! Until i discovered the killer mosquitoe racket :D
http://image.made-in...ket-HYD-43-.jpg
And now I hunt each and everyone down ... i have taken my life's revenge from the mosquitoes this year!

#25 BurgundyTears

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Posted 11 August 2011 - 11:44 AM

Poor lizards....

When we got lizards or frogs in the house in Florida, we'd just catch them and put them back outside, if we got to them before the cat. If the cat got to them first, we said a brief eulogy and removed the corpse.

If there are lizards in your house, you probably have a wonderful variety of spiders and just haven't learned the names yet.

#26 Sondilyn

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Posted 11 August 2011 - 11:27 PM

I remember going to Florida and taking a picture of every stray lizard I saw. XD

#27 Guest_bulleto_*

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Posted 12 August 2011 - 12:42 AM

they move sooo fast, i dont think its even possible to take their pic. But oh unless you have a good camera with some lense that you can use to focus on them while standing far away from them and they dont know. My cell phone cam cant do that.

Edited by bulleto, 12 August 2011 - 12:45 AM.


#28 BurgundyTears

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Posted 12 August 2011 - 11:40 AM

As in...an actual camera. Not a point-and-shoot and not a cell camera (which is a minimalist point-and-shoot).

The insects wanted to remind me that we've still got a month to go before Iowa starts cooling down. Today there was a large (though not as large) brown house spider hanging out in my box of pads in my bathroom cupboard.

Also, not my house, but a couple spiders are trying to take over my mail box. Every time I open it I get spider webs on my hand.

#29 Showsni

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Posted 12 August 2011 - 04:16 PM

I think I've only ever seen one wild lizard in Britain in my whole life. That was a slow worm, in Cornwall (or possibly Devon). Lizards are really rare around here... We were on holiday in Malta, and they were everywhere. It was awesome. We do have three wild species of lizard; they must just be good at hiding...

#30 Sondilyn

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Posted 12 August 2011 - 06:14 PM

they move sooo fast, i dont think its even possible to take their pic. But oh unless you have a good camera with some lense that you can use to focus on them while standing far away from them and they dont know. My cell phone cam cant do that.


The first one I saw I freaked out (in a good way) and seriously fell to the ground with my camera. It stayed pretty chill so I got a few good pics of it. I must have been a little over a foot away from it. After that I just used uber zoom and took pics of them from far off... like in alligator pens at the zoo.